Do you ask for permission to your parents before going somewhere? I think the answer affirmative is common among the Asian families. Do you ask your parents before having an ice-cream from your fridge? If you are laughing at this, let me tell you, this type of families exist too!
Though it’s just an ice-cream, those parents would fix when the child can have it, whether he is in a perfect condition to have it or not. These protective parents simply do not want their child to catch cold.
You might often find people of age 25 whose life has been all on their parents. From the toothbrush to the institutions they studied in, everything was chosen by their parents. Now if you ask any of them out, he might answer, “Ah I have to ask my mom first!” Maybe it seems sweet and that person will probably give you an obedient impression, but the reality is, we all have to reach a point when we have to make decisions on our own, this guy will be so screwed up that day!!
We all have to suffer from indecisions more or less. For some people, it crosses a limit, psychologists recognise this as a disorder called ‘Aboulomania’. Funny (or sad) part is they agree that ‘This disorder happens mostly to those people who have overprotective parents‘ Today a mom might compliment her son to be so polite and dutiful, but who knows the next day, in her absence, her son will not be suffering from aboulomania?
Some parents highly discourage or even punish their children for taking any decisions or having choices of their own. Those children eventually get used to depend on their parents and guardians more than needed. This is the root of the disorder. I can’t deny that some people are naturally subservient.
Aboulomaniacs are tend to make everyone happy. In any sort of relationship, they play a passive role. People might just call that person ‘dumb’ but only he knows what he suffers from. Though as far as I read, most of the aboulomaniacs do not realize their problem. I have a friend who cannot take a single decision independently. If I ask her which color she prefers, red or blue, she will look at my face to figure out what answer I will prefer, so that she doesn’t make me say ‘oh-no’. I don’t see she realizes how pathetic this is. For your information, these patients never expresses their disagreements with you. You little disapproval hurts them too much!
Abiding by your parents is one of the best things you can do, still, suffering from something isn’t an option. Talk to your parents sometimes if you have recognise yourself to have this. Talk and try to help the those who you think are badly suffering from this. In the end of the, we stand on our own feet, not anyone else’s.
samha's table 